"No, no, I never eat anything for luncheon. Just a bite, I never want
more than that, and I eat that more as an excuse for conversation than any-
thing else. I couldn't possibly eat anything more unless they had some of
those giant asparagus. I should be sorry to leave Paris without having some
of them. "
My heart sank. I had seen them in the shops, and I knew that they
were horribly expensive. My mouth had often watered at the sight of them.
"Madame wants to know if you have any of those giant asparagus, " I
asked the waiter.
I tried with all my might to will him to say no. A happy smile spread over his broad, priest-like face, and he assured me that they had some so
large, so splendid, so tender, that it was a marvel.
"I'm not in the least hungry, " my guest sighed, "but if you insist I
don't mind having some asparagus. "
I ordered them.
"Aren't you going to have any?"
"No, I never eat asparagus. "
"I know there are people who don't like them. The fact is, you ruin
your taste by all the meat you eat. " We waited for the asparagus to be cooked. Panic seized me. It was not
a question now how much money I should have left over for the rest of the
month, but whether I had enough to pay the bill. It would be embarrassing
to find myself ten francs short and be obliged to borrow from my guest . I
could not bring myself to do that. I knew exactly how much I had, and if
the bill came to more I made up my mind that I would put my hand in my
pocket and with a dramatic cry start up and say it had been picked. Of
course, it would be awkward if she had not money enough either to pay the
bill. Then the only thing would be to leave my watch and say I would come
back and pay later.
The asparagus appeared. They were enormous, juicy, and appetising. I
watched the wicked woman thrust them down her throat in large mouthfuls,
and in my polite way I spoke about the condition of the drama in the
Balkans. At last she finished.
"Coffee?" I said.
"Yes, just an ice-cream and coffee, " she answered.
W.Somerset maugham, The Luncheon
This post has been edited by Johnnie Walker on 12 Feb 2008, 22:33 
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